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Archive for January, 2010

Peace

It is now a few days into the new year and I find that I am achieving something I never really expected. Peace. Not only have I prayed for it but I have sat many mornings in my favorite chair in a meditative state trying to find it. As I called out to God and the Universe to help me out of life’s predicaments and calm my mounting anxieties, I hoped beyond hope that I would be saved. I hate the situation I am in. It’s like quicksand. The more I struggle to get out of it, the deeper I sink so like a drowning woman who has given up, I have stopped thrashing around and imagined my rescue instead. When I say I have stopped struggling, I don’t mean I have stopped doing what is put in front of me to do, I mean I have stopped beating my head against the wall to make things happen. My situation hasn’t gotten any better right at the moment but my body is reaping the benefits of letting go. Of course I will still dream and work on the things that are put before me but I will stop making life such a struggle and trust more. I am confident opportunities will come because it is what my soul desires. If my soul desires it, it is put there by God and he never disappoints. What I have learned:
Don’t forget to see the clues along the way such as when someone says something and it stands out to you or out of the blue you read something that fits your situation. You will be surprised how many things will just start showing up to guide you to where you want to be. Feel free to share your experiences with me. I’d love to read them.

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I enter this new year with nothing in my pocket yet I have a place to lay my head, thanks to my children. My belly is full thanks to government food stamps. I am healthy this year thanks to my doctors. I have love beyond measure thanks to family, friends and my cat. Clothes on my back thanks to my sister. A little work thanks to a wonderful caring entrepreneur couple. An outlet for my writing creativity thanks to my writer’s critique group. A little bit of energy thanks to my morning cup of coffee. Air to breathe thanks to my creator. And last but not least, hope for the future thanks to my sweet little grandbaby, TJ, who gives Nana hugs, slobbery wet kisses and looks right into my soul with his big beautiful eyes and lets me know how important it is to stay in the moment.

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