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Archive for June, 2011

Hang In There

Funny the things we think of in our quiet time. I think mostly of my dreams but also how to make my life work as it is. At present, I am consumed with finding a job. Today I thought about all those youtubers that are traveling around the world on nearly no money. How are they doing that? Some say they are earning a living on the internet but as of today, and it’s been a long search, I have not found any legitimate internet business. Though I have a brand spanking new AA degree, I am still unemployed. I somehow missed the classes that teach you how to market yourself with your degree and get a job. I think it should be a requirement that before you graduate you must take a class in it. It’s is very disheartening to have an education and find no work. I have to say it is not the education’s fault that I have no job. I am pro education. Just seems a shame non the less. However, when I look at my Dad, having only an 8th grade education and no internet experience, he still has found a way to work for himself and make quite a good living at least part of the year though he makes that money last all year. Bravo Dad! I have a smart Dad. I figure then, that I did not get the self employment gene. As much as I want it, I didn’t get it. Maybe I’m like those wandering/creative type people. You know the ones who gather in eco villages. I think I would be happy there except for the no air and heat issue. I can even deal with the outhouse situation. They are just not able to work a regular job without feeling suffocated and sick. Maybe me and they have not found the right livelihoods, but I daresay it is more that the world is not geared toward people like us. We are super hardworking and dedicated to a job if we could find something that we believe in, stimulates us, makes us feel we are giving back to the world and making a difference. For people like me and my friends, we would just as soon bypass getting paid for our work. We are not driven by material possession or monetary reward. The hard part is we need the cash in order to survive. So how do us creative types find legitimate work without losing our minds or our health to do it. We need work that fulfills us and meets our needs too. As much as I hate to admit it, I am never going to be able to be happy or healthy working a traditional job. I feel guilty about that when I know others can. I feel something is wrong with me and I feel irresponsible to those who live around me and ultimately have to keep helping me out. It crushes me and makes me feel less that I am. Still I am driven by my need for flexibility of personal space to create and help others. I can’t be restricted by a time clock either to show up or to leave. I am a dedicated person to the causes I believe in and will do almost anything to preserve and protect those causes even if to my own detriment. How valuable is that? What if every employee felt that way about their job/work? It’s just not the case nor ever will be in this world but cool thought. How do we creative types get through life with our self esteem and respect in tact when the world is telling us to be something we are not? I do not have answers but I know that I must find a way to adjust to what I must do to support myself until that opportunity comes along that will give me all that I need including giving back. Hang in there my creative friends. It will not always be thus. We have value and wonderful skills to offer the world if they will just give us a chance.

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Okay. Now I’m 50. Wow, that’s an eye opener. I don’t feel as though 50 is old, but it is a mile marker in my life. I have had many personal accomplishments, all of which right now feel nil when faced with the enormity of “what am I going to do now?” I am unemployed, except for some occasional jobs my wonderful friends or home health care employer sends my way. A myriad of life events have knocked me off my feet financially and physically. Very unexpected. Even if I had planned for these disasters, I would still be in the same place. If I had had money I would still be financially ruined from medical bills. From illness I would still not be as energetic and healthy as I once was. So first thing I am determine to do, and determination is all I have, will be to refuse to blame myself for what has happened and try to think outside the box of how to solve this problem. I wish I could solve this problem mathematically and come up with a concrete answer. Even if I didn’t know how to solve it, I could find someone who did, learn from my mistakes and get back on my feet. Unfortunately it is not as simple as that. The truth is, I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know what mistakes I am making. I don’t know how to solve this problem. You see, I am an English person, not a Math person. I am creative, not calculative. I’m a thinker, philospher type person, not a problem solver per se. So where does that leave me? I am like many of my single creative friends who are struggling with the same issues. What are we going to do now? Our kids are grown. We may be out of work. We have health issues we could hot have prepared for. Now we have to figure out some way to support ourselves and no longer be a burden on our kids. We are too young for an “old folks home” nor do we have the funds to live in one if we had to.We can not go back home even if invited. Living with our parents would not solve our situation and would just cause us to eventually be a burden on them. Besides it would add to the mounting depression being without our grandbabies. I’m talking about me here, but if the situation fits I give you permission to own it. Another option: live with our kids. Our income is sparse or non existent so how do we share the cost of rooming with our kids. They struggle themselves to find their way in this world and stay afloat? Sure we can take some stress out of their lives by providing endless hours of babysitting the grandbabies as well as housecleaning and pet care they need monetary compensation too. The fact is jobs are sparse as is our energy and strength, so we must think outside the box and create for ourselves a new income stream. How do we do that? We creative types are good at that outside of the box thinking, if we can get over the hump of constant worry and feelings of overwhelm. Maybe brainstorming together may be key. What do you think? In the meantime, go out there my friends and be inspired. Be unafraid to try something new and market yourself and your valuable skills. Still feel you don’t know what to do. Ask the Universe. Then remember this one thing, “When the student is ready, the teacher will come.” Help is on the way. Are you ready my friends? I know you are.

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If Sunday was my most favorite day of the week, Monday would be my least. Seems there is no way to transition into the start of another week to make it easier, as I am not a person who does well with changes, even good ones. It’s not that I want everything to stay the same either, but I think it’s just the uncertainty of new things and how they will turn out that gets me. Take my daughter buying a new house for example. She has asked the whole family to move in with her and help pay the mortgage. First of all, so sweet of her! Secondly, we believe it will work cause we all lived together before in a much smaller residence with an additional friend who slept on her married sister and brother in law’s floor. By that time, they had had their baby and my newborn grandson was sleeping in their bed. We are a very tolerant and accepting people, that is why it works. Now that the new residence will belong to my daughter, it will be a different situation all together. She will have her way of taking care of the place as well as decorating. We will pitch in to help her of course. We all trust things will go well and are super excited to be moving in together again, but we will have to remember to respect her wishes and she will still have to be lenient on us especially with spills and sticky little guy fingers. I am the most excited as I will have my grandbaby with me every single day, even sharing a room with the little guy. Even though we have had the skills and patience to make it work in the past, I have the slightest hesitation and concern for the future. For other families, no way would situation ever work. I think we are lucky and it will work. I will definitely keep you updated. Anyway, life is full of changes. Some good, some bad. Maybe it would be easier if we could by pass Monday and go straight to Tuesday.

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Just when I thought I couldn’t hate job hunting more, I think I’ve found a way to enjoy it. Just a few rules to go by for a smooth enjoyable hunt. Step 1: Dress nice. It not only presents you well, but makes you feel your best. Step 2: Be friendly and personable. After the initial intro to everyone from person behind the counter to manager treat them all as though they did you a great favor and you are going to be good friends. REMEMBER YOUR MANNERS! Say “Thank You” and “Nice To Meet You” among other politeness. Step 3: Never under any circumstance, even if you are being evicted, beg for a job or act like you are desperate. People hate that, it makes you feel worse, and is a sure way to NOT get a job. Step 5 and lastly, know someone where you want to work. Connections, connections, connections. Practically all successes seem to be based on who you know. Don’t despair if you don’t know anyone though. There is still hope. Just go back to step number 2. Make a friend with any and all people you come into contact with, especially the person who can give you the job or knows the right person who can. If you don’t know how to make a friend you have bigger problems than no job. Never fear, I’m going to tell you how to do that too in my next blog. Ok all you job hunters, get out there and put your new plan to work. Even if you don’t snag a job the first time out, you are learning to be more comfortable and might even enjoy yourself. Remember job hunting warriors, it’s not about the job. It’s about the job hunt. Just like life it’s the journey that counts.

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